Backsliding

For the past few months, I’ve been struggling in my relationship with God. It all began with me, I became less consistent in talking to Him each day, I fell off my Bible reading schedule and started prioritising little unimportant matters to justify time spent doing other things when I knew I should be spending time with God. I became too “busy” to spend time with the One I love most in the world. I let the devil lie to me by telling me that I was doing fine and it was just a busy period, that when things died down I’d go back to normal. I’ve learned that God is always there for you but He won’t hunt you down. He won’t force you to worship Him or pray and spend time with Him. Ultimately, it’s your decision whether you want to follow Him and it’s the most beneficial decision anyone can ever make. However, when you do choose to follow Him, a whole slew of problems set in: temptation, discouragement, fear and, worst of all, backsliding.

The thing about backsliding is the further you go the more you begin to believe that you can’t get back to where you were. Progress with God is not linear - not by any means. There are highs and lows. Even great people in the Bible had moments of weakness where temptation overcame them or the world drew their attention away but, at least in the case of King David, they came back. David dedicated his life to God again and again and God called him, “... a man after [His] own heart.” Acts 13:22 The difference between David and Saul, the first king of Israel, was that Saul was too proud to come back to God penitently when he went astray. He kept foolishly trying to make his own way and it eventually led to his demise. Sometimes that’s the way we are. In my case, I come up with all kinds of reasons why it’s too late or I’ve gone too far to talk to God and ask Him to fix the mess I’ve made - again. Sometimes it just feels like we’ve made the same mistake too many times and this time God really might not forgive us. Other times we’re in denial and can’t face the fact that the more we flail around in our problems, trying to help ourselves, the further down we sink. Whatever the cause may be for keeping you stuck in your old ways, release it now and come back to God because no matter how far you go from Him, He’ll always be in the same spot, waiting for you. His love covers a multitude of sins and the easiest way to get over the hurdle of backsliding is to just confess your sins to Him. 1 John 1:9-10 NIV says, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make Him out to be a liar and His word is not in us.”

Losing touch with God is lonely. He is our sole reason for living and working and existing at all. Without Him, life becomes grey and uncertain, issues that you dealt with a long time ago may resurface and overall, your quality of life plummets. I know it's hard to admit to yourself the extent of your backsliding let alone confess it to God, but take comfort in the fact that no matter how far you run from Him, He will never leave you, as a matter of fact, His Holy Spirit will always be with you. As long as you’re a child of God, your conscience will continue to prick you when you’re doing the wrong thing and His voice will always lead you in the way you should go. If you find that you’ve taken a wrong turn or two, you need to come back to Him and repent because the worst thing you can do is try and live without Him. I’ve learned from experience that life is only worth living with the LORD in it. His Spirit makes even the mundane and boring seem new and exciting; life, in all its essence, seems doable when He’s by your side. He uplifts you when you’re tired and comforts you when you’re down - you couldn’t ask for a better Friend. I want to encourage you today to find your way back to Him and begin to seek His face. I assure you that He will be consistent and faithful like He always has and, honestly, it’s the best feeling in the world to know that you don’t have to do life alone anymore - there’s Someone you can always count on. Like the verse says, “For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.” Matthew 7:8 NIV I trust that God will begin to rebuild your life as soon as you ask Him.