I’ve grown up in what I consider to be the most competitive household - probably in the world. A simple conversation can turn into a cut-throat contest. Maybe that’s why I absolutely relish winning, with that being said there was a time when I also happened to detest losing. I was that person who claimed “But that’s what I meant.” in an argument. It was so hard for me to accept being wrong and when I was told I was, I would lose my head. To me, it seemed like I was being made inferior. Not only when I was wrong but even when I was simply being corrected. I punctuated every conversation with “Yeah I know.” Since reading the book of Proverbs I’ve started taking criticism better. King Solomon writes in Proverbs 19:20 (NIV) “Listen to advice and accept discipline and at the end you will be counted among the wise.”
I can’t count the number of times that my parents have told me to do something, I objected and later paid for my stubbornness. It was like I was allergic to accepting advice. I remember one of the many times that my mother told me to put on a hoodie and I refused; that particular time, I ended up extremely sick as a result. Ever since then I’ve started listening to advice given to me. In his book “12 Rules of Life” psychologist Jordan Peterson stated Rule #9 to be: “Assume That The Person You Are Listening To Might Know Something You Don’t.” This means you must at least consider what people tell you. It is easy to have something go in one ear and out the other; too often, we dismiss useful advice because we feel we don’t need it.
Proverbs 12:15 (NIV) says, “The way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice.” It’s self-righteous, in a sense, to assume that you know everything, to not be able to listen to others’ counsel because, to you, it’s not worth listening to. The greatest debaters, politicians, lawyers, and even people I know personally, know how to listen. It’s something I’ve learned to admire and actively pursue. I grew sick of constantly throwing fits at the slightest prompts. Slowly God began to change my heart and mind, He led me to adjust my thinking. Instead of viewing advice as an insult to my intelligence, I started seeing it as an opportunity to learn. Since then God has completely transformed me. Now, in conversations and debates, I ask “Why?” And in times of instruction and advice, I’ve learned to say “Okay” instead of arguing. Having the confidence to admit when you’re wrong and the strength to want to acquire other perspectives… that’s what I call wisdom!
Apostle Joseph Serwadda is one great brain in town, long ago he said, "it's better to be silent if you're very sure you're right. Coz when u argue with fools, you've gone to their lower level where they've better experience and they'll defeat you." Most of us (humans) just argue to satisfy our ego even when we know we're wrong. Indeed bible is against arguments & altering the original doctrine. You've written a Great piece 🥧
wow...first time here. thank you for this piece of wisdom
Great writing Nkunzi, very important to remember to accept when we are wrong and learn to understand where we went wrong.
Wisdom✨✨I believe as Christians, we need to learn to accept rebuke, sometimes I do the same, I argue with my parents and my guardians and I feel like I just want to be right. But just like you said from Proverbs 12:15, the wise listen to advice. I am truly blessed.
Wisdom indeed my Nkunzi💜💫💜💫