Your Value

Can you believe that even though I’ve always known that God loves me, for the longest time I sought validation from others? I would put on my best show to make sure that others approved of me. My value came from the world… and that’s not a good thing. Ephesians 3:17-19 (NIV) says, “...And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the LORD’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.”

Galatians 1:10 (NIV) states: “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” As humans, we can do crazy things to be appreciated by others. I’ve definitely struggled with this because as a kid, all you really want to do is fit in, right? I would say things just to get people’s attention. My daily criteria was essentially: “What do people want to hear?” I yearned to be accepted. I longed to fit in, but as a Christian, that wasn’t my calling. It took a global pandemic for me to fall in love with the idea of being a true Christian. The idea of shrugging off others' opinions of me and taking on the tasks God had for me. Even though I was taught that Jesus loves me from such a young age, it took extreme isolation for me to truly get it. Humans are funny that way.

I’ve come to find the beauty in not seeking validation from others. The people in my life that I respect and admire most, are people who are so comfortable with being themselves. Not caring what people around them think of them. So how do we do it? How do we stop relying on others to place a value on us? There are many different ways to become confident in your identity in Christ but for me that meant taking a trust fall. Whatever was happening in my life, I just gave it to God. Fully, not half-heartedly. Not “I give this to You, Father but please just…” Being the control freak I tend to be, that was a gigantic leap. What happened next is what has led to me having more trust in God - He worked it out, all of it. He sorted everything out, better than I could possibly imagine. It’s this trust in Him that has led me to not care what other’s think. Knowing how mighty God is, He still took the time to handle every one of my little requests. It was that leap of faith that showed me He cares, it showed me that God truly cares for me as His daughter. And that was only a taste of His love for me.

His love never fails. His love is patient. His love is kind. It's not quantifiable. You can walk away from God, but He will never walk away from you. We should ask ourselves if we seek validation from the world, or from our Heavenly Father? When we’re about to make a decision, form an opinion or join a conversation, are we saying the things that people want to hear or things that make God proud? In seeking validation we can say things that hurt God. We can do things that He despises and we begin to transform into a person of the world, moulded by earthly desires. We begin to predetermine our actions based on what the world thinks, based on the fear of being different.

It took time for me to grasp this but once you draw near to God, trust me when I say you would be a fool to want out! I know that for me, it’s hard to remember that God loves me sometimes. It’s hard to wrap your head around the fact that there is Someone Who loves you no matter what. He loves you genuinely and truly, and there is nothing you can do to change that. Try and remember you have Someone you can always call “Friend”.

I hope that after reading this you have a new outlook on your value so that you stop basing it on the world. I hope that you’ll begin to know that He has an unending love for you. You will never stop being loved, so let’s stop falling into the dangerous lifestyle of living for the whole world and trying to fit in, but instead live for God - an audience of One.